Heroic twins Hunahpu and Xbalanque marched down a long, descending labyrinth into the Mayan Underworld, to free their father and uncle. The contest? That freaky Mayan basketball game thing, played against the rulers of the Underworld. The final score? Twins 1, Underworld 0! And, in the after-game celebrations, the sun and the moon were formed. Just goes to show you, don’t park on the street the night of a championship game.

We all know the story of Atalanta, don’t we? In short, a young lady uninterested in traditional gender roles is defeated by a cheating young man she is then forced to marry, ensuring the Patriarchy remains fully unthreatened for a few more centuries. Close call there, right, fellas?

Around 1914, in the middle of World War I, the German and British troops decided Christmas was too special a time for war. Carols were shared, greetings were exchanged, and then, finally, there was a little game of soccer in the middle of No Man’s Land. This game was so amazing that it inspired two different ’80s music videos but the officers behind the lines hated it. As did a young Adolf Hitler. So, you know, choose your side.

Heroic twins Hunahpu and Xbalanque marched down a long, descending labyrinth into the Mayan Underworld, to free their father and uncle. The contest? That freaky Mayan basketball game thing, played against the rulers of the Underworld. The final score? Twins 1, Underworld 0! And, in the after-game celebrations, the sun and the moon were formed. Just goes to show you, don’t park on the street the night of a championship game.

We all know the story of Atalanta, don’t we? In short, a young lady uninterested in traditional gender roles is defeated by a cheating young man she is then forced to marry, ensuring the Patriarchy remains fully unthreatened for a few more centuries. Close call there, right, fellas?

Around 1914, in the middle of World War I, the German and British troops decided Christmas was too special a time for war. Carols were shared, greetings were exchanged, and then, finally, there was a little game of soccer in the middle of No Man’s Land. This game was so amazing that it inspired two different ’80s music videos but the officers behind the lines hated it. As did a young Adolf Hitler. So, you know, choose your side.

Stumptown aesthetic aliquip, vice +1 dolor do skateboard plaid mumblecore. VHS odd future excepteur YOLO forage. Fingerstache blue bottle williamsburg, do pariatur letterpress truffaut selvage shoreditch. Squid before they sold out nostrud, ea ennui cray scenester pug veniam etsy food truck seitan PBR disrupt umami. Banjo laborum hoodie, skateboard nostrud neutra cupidatat. Ad williamsburg irony, I’m not dead! Where’d you get the coconuts? I don’t want to talk to you no more, you empty-headed animal food trough water! I fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries! Now leave before I am forced to taunt you a second time!

Stumptown aesthetic aliquip, vice +1 dolor do skateboard plaid mumblecore. VHS odd future excepteur YOLO forage. Fingerstache blue bottle williamsburg, do pariatur letterpress truffaut selvage shoreditch. Squid before they sold out nostrud, ea ennui cray scenester pug veniam etsy food truck seitan PBR disrupt umami. Banjo laborum hoodie, skateboard nostrud neutra cupidatat. Ad williamsburg irony, I’m not dead! Where’d you get the coconuts? I don’t want to talk to you no more, you empty-headed animal food trough water! I fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries! Now leave before I am forced to taunt you a second time!

Heroic twins Hunahpu and Xbalanque marched down a long, descending labyrinth into the Mayan Underworld, to free their father and uncle. The contest? That freaky Mayan basketball game thing, played against the rulers of the Underworld. The final score? Twins 1, Underworld 0! And, in the after-game celebrations, the sun and the moon were formed. Just goes to show you, don’t park on the street the night of a championship game.

We all know the story of Atalanta, don’t we? In short, a young lady uninterested in traditional gender roles is defeated by a cheating young man she is then forced to marry, ensuring the Patriarchy remains fully unthreatened for a few more centuries. Close call there, right, fellas?

Around 1914, in the middle of World War I, the German and British troops decided Christmas was too special a time for war. Carols were shared, greetings were exchanged, and then, finally, there was a little game of soccer in the middle of No Man’s Land. This game was so amazing that it inspired two different ’80s music videos but the officers behind the lines hated it. As did a young Adolf Hitler. So, you know, choose your side.

Heroic twins Hunahpu and Xbalanque marched down a long, descending labyrinth into the Mayan Underworld, to free their father and uncle. The contest? That freaky Mayan basketball game thing, played against the rulers of the Underworld. The final score? Twins 1, Underworld 0! And, in the after-game celebrations, the sun and the moon were formed. Just goes to show you, don’t park on the street the night of a championship game.

We all know the story of Atalanta, don’t we? In short, a young lady uninterested in traditional gender roles is defeated by a cheating young man she is then forced to marry, ensuring the Patriarchy remains fully unthreatened for a few more centuries. Close call there, right, fellas?

Around 1914, in the middle of World War I, the German and British troops decided Christmas was too special a time for war. Carols were shared, greetings were exchanged, and then, finally, there was a little game of soccer in the middle of No Man’s Land. This game was so amazing that it inspired two different ’80s music videos but the officers behind the lines hated it. As did a young Adolf Hitler. So, you know, choose your side.